The year is 2026. Silicon Valley has been overrun.
Massive, bloated Series-B unicorns are roaming the streets of SF. They have zero revenue, thousands of employees, and their founders are fully vested. The entire ecosystem is collapsing under the weight of EU Regulations and lethal Return-to-Office mandates.
There is only one solution: Maude.
She is a rogue vibe coder armed with nothing but a laptop, oversized headphones, and a devastating arsenal of Zero-Shot Prompts.
Your objective is simple: Disrupt the bloatware. Vaporize the unicorns.
The Survival Guide:
The Arsenal: Fire Zero-Shot Prompts to destroy valuations.
H100 GPUs: Hoard 10 of them to temporarily achieve AGI God Mode.
The Diet: Survive on $14 toxic-positivity Matchas and 5-second bursts of unhinged rapid-fire from your Byn pouches.
The Threats: Avoid the RTO scanners and EU Regulation hurdles at all costs. They are instant death.
If you are currently employed at a pre-profit, post-Series-C startup, please be advised: Maude is approaching rapidly, and your severance package will not save you.
Play the simulator. Learn the routes. Prepare for disruption.
The year is 2026. Silicon Valley has been overrun.
Massive, bloated Series-B unicorns are roaming the streets of SF. They have zero revenue, thousands of employees, and their founders are fully vested. The entire ecosystem is collapsing under the weight of EU Regulations and lethal Return-to-Office mandates.
There is only one solution: Maude.
She is a rogue vibe coder armed with nothing but a laptop, oversized headphones, and a devastating arsenal of Zero-Shot Prompts.
Your objective is simple: Disrupt the bloatware. Vaporize the unicorns.
The Survival Guide:
The Arsenal: Fire Zero-Shot Prompts to destroy valuations.
H100 GPUs: Hoard 10 of them to temporarily achieve AGI God Mode.
The Diet: Survive on $14 toxic-positivity Matchas and 5-second bursts of unhinged rapid-fire from your Byn pouches.
The Threats: Avoid the RTO scanners and EU Regulation hurdles at all costs. They are instant death.
If you are currently employed at a pre-profit, post-Series-C startup, please be advised: Maude is approaching rapidly, and your severance package will not save you.
Play the simulator. Learn the routes. Prepare for disruption.